To Know You is To Love You (And Vice-Versa)

Have you ever caught yourself harboring resentment towards someone you have never even spoken to?

I'm embarrassed to admit this, but it happens to me all the time. At stores. On public transportation. In restaurants or bars. When new people start at work. With my neighbors. I really find the most creative nuances to define as annoyances. I don't like someone because they wear flood pants. I can't stand this guys gel-filled hair. Look at her crooked teeth (by the way, my teeth are NOT straight.)

It could be that someone swaggering around. Why not just walk? I hate overconfidence and arrogance. I don't like that person. (Who defines a swagger anyways?)

And, it makes me wonder how I can be so completely shallow and closed-off. Small-minded at best! How is this possible when I have friends of all different ethnicities, backgrounds, etc? I have always worked in jobs where I have a lot of interaction with people. I have even lived in other countries and all around America. I did a year of Americorps, for Christ's sake. How can it be possible that I judge so many people?! I swear I am not a bad person.

And, then it hit me one day--I hate everyone I don't know and love everyone I do! What kind of sense does that make? As in, I hate people, but love persons.

This was especially made apparant when I taught English in China. As a whole, I would get extremely frustrated with the Chinese poplulation. But, one-on one, I made some of the dearest friendships I have ever had. Ones I still cherish to this day.

So, why do I do this?

Is it a defense mechanism? If I already dislike them, why would it matter if they don't like me? Latent behaviors from being picked on in grade school?

Is it pure intollerance? Willful ignorance? Yikes.

Please tell me I'm not the only one who is like this. Please tell me someone else has judged someone on their bad highlights and later came to find that said person is one of the most intriguing and wonderful friends ever--chunky highlights and all!

To all those people in the world who I have never talked to (and am probably irrationally judging right now), would you like to get a coffee?

(And, why is that random guy in the other room talking so loudly?! So annoying. . .)